They were happy to have pulled both ears.
"Mister, are you drunk or something?" Karinka wouldn't let up.
"Karina, screw that drunk woodpecker," I tried to reason with her, "let's just walk around him and that's it. We've only got about 150 meters left to the entrance. And you're picking fights with all sorts of drunks."
"He's not a drunk, he just got drunk."
"Screw off, both of you," the man reeked, "it's my birthday, so I have the right to observe the culture of drinking with my buddies in the garage."
"This drunken beast will probably go home now, start harassing his wife, scaring the kids. So be glad, Karinka, that he's not your dad."
"If he were, I'd
have educated him. Maybe we should give him a 'happy birthday to you'? I'm already all wet down there. And the garages aren't over yet.""Hey, chickadee, who are you planning to 'happy-birthday'? Me or what?" – the man stopped and looked at both of us with drunken eyes.
"Not 'happy-birthday', we're going to 'happy-pussy' you now," I decided to back up Karinka, because I was getting wet too.
"Yeah, we'll grab you by both ears and treat you to a congratulatory drink."
"Not bad, not bad... I like being treated. How about coming to my garage?"
Karinka and I exchanged glances.
"Don't be scared, scaredy-cats. Uncle won't hurt you. Uncle will just whisper in your ear and that's it..."
"Well, okay, we won't be scared. Should we go then?.."
"What do you mean 'won't be'? If uncle doesn't want to be pissed on, then we need to pee now so we don't feel like it later."
Karinka squatted right in the middle of the garage cooperative, moved her panties aside, and a trickling sound started. Seeing that made me want to go too. I wasn't wearing panties, so I just spread my legs wider, pulled up my skirt, spread my labia with two fingers, pushed my pussy forward, and also let out a stream.
"Man, why are you staring? Come on, take yours out too, whatever you've got, and join in."
"Fuck, you're crazy! I meant – 'don't be scared' as in don't be afraid."
"Uncle, don't get so worked up," Karinka tried to calm him, "Ksyukha and I are good girls from decent families. What's your name?"
"Valera."
***
We walked about 50 meters to his garage, then he fumbled with keys and locks for a long time to open it. Inside was a 200-series Land Cruiser.
"Karina, I don't like guys with Land Cruisers. Maybe we should bail?.."
"Of course you don't. Your type is disheveled boys on rusty old Ladas."
In the garage, besides the car, there was also a sofa, and next to it a piece of a Soviet-era wall unit. Inside were bottles of Olmeca tequila, whiskey, cognac, and vodka. Nearby were non-alcoholic drinks and lots of mineral water. The only snack was a leftover bag of chips. Valera got out glasses, washed them, and his whole demeanor hinted that he wasn't as drunk as we might have wanted.
"Don't you have any wine?" I asked.
"Don't keep wine. You can dilute cognac with cola."
Valera started hitting the whiskey hard. Apparently wanted to catch up. And we sipped cognac with cola. Within about 15 minutes he was in decent shape. It was time to use Valera for his intended purpose. He sprawled on the sofa, and Karina meanwhile took off her panties, opened the unlocked door of the Land Cruiser, and put them in the glove compartment.
"I'll leave them for him as a souvenir, he'll have something to tell his wife if she finds them first."
"You're mean, Karinka."
"You say that because you don't wear panties. You'd do the same."
"Well, that's it, we've had our drinks, time for beddy-bye. All good things in moderation," Valera grumbled, "close the door behind you."
Before he could turn on his side, Karina simply walked to the edge of the sofa and sat on his face with her bare pussy.
"Finally," she purred contentedly, "found a place for my pilot's cap. The last time someone licked my pussy was like two weeks ago... Or three. Damn it! Last month Yarik polished my pilot's cap. And after that, no one's spoiled me with their tongue."
I had to jump on Valera's legs so he wouldn't thrash around. And we also held his hands so he wouldn't wave them.
"Karina, don't smother him with your pussy, you never know..."
"Oh, come on, don't start with the safety talk. I can feel the breeze through my labia. So he's breathing. Now I'll rub my clit good on his nose and come."
"What, he's not licking?"
"Nope."
Valera was grunting discontentedly into Karina's pussy at this time.
"Let's put him on his side, and I'll wrap my thighs around his head to come faster."
Luckily, the width of the unfolded sofa allowed it. Karinka started to lean over, while holding Valera's head with both hands. I got off his legs so he could lie on his side. When he turned, Karina stretched out her legs and squeezed his head quite hard with her thighs.
"You need to try with your tongue, mister, or I'll pull your ears," Karina whispered and started rubbing her slurping pussy all over his face with all her might.
Where does she get so much unbridled energy?
"Well, how do you like my little birthday congratulations? Tasty?"
"M-m-m-m-m!!!"
"O-oh! And here comes the tongue! Finally. Thought I'd never wait. So, Valera, now you'll polish my clitoris properly with your tongue, and in gratitude, I'll loosen the thigh grip a bit. Because I'm already tired of squeezing your head with my thighs."
The slurping sounds changed to ones that sounded like tongue work.
"You should spread your thighs apart first, you've covered his ears. He can't hear you anyway. Lousy facesitter."
"Don't bullshit, Ksyusha. He understood me perfectly. See how hard he's trying with his tongue."
Karinka slightly lifted her skirt to demonstrate the work of the drunken tongue.
"His tongue is slurring, what's there to see? What if he pukes on your pussy now, what will you do? Keep raping his face?"
"Ksyusha, I'll never come under your commentary like this. Go out of the garage and don't interfere with my fun. A drunk pussy-licker between my thighs is better than a vibrator under the blanket."
I went out for some fresh air. Outside, it had suddenly gotten dark and cold. There was no lighting in the garage cooperative. I stood like that for about 15 minutes, smoked two cigarettes. Then came Karinka's drawn-out moans. Usually, during an orgasm, she just breathes loudly or growls, but here she apparently decided no one would hear her and wanted to scream at the top of her lungs.
"Well, what, is he still alive there? Didn't drown in your secretions?" I asked, entering the garage.
We helped Valera sit up on the sofa. Karinka poured him more whiskey.
"Here, wash it down. You ate well between my legs. Look, my cum is hanging down to the floor from your face. Did you like my birthday congratulations? Ah, don't answer. I can see from your face you liked it. I'm going for a smoke."
Karina happily jumped out of the garage, and Valera tried to wash down all the horror of what had happened to him with whiskey. His face was all slimy and red. I took wet wipes from my purse and handed them to Valera. He started wiping himself and used up the whole pack. He tried to say something, but his tongue wouldn't obey. Apparently tired from the hard work.
"Well, Valer, happy birthday, damn it!"
He tried to answer something, but he couldn't manage.
"Actually, I wouldn't mind some oral affection from you either. But your face looks so worn out, I don't really feel like using you."
I stood in front of him, pulled up my skirt, and pushed out my pussy.
"See how wet it is here, everything's already slurping, you could even stick your hand in and scoop out the lube. But I'm afraid you wouldn't survive a second act. So Karina and I will probably go."
***
"You came pretty fast," Karinka murmured.
"I didn't force him to go down on me. His whole face is battered. And someone already licked me this week, so it's fine, I'll manage."
"Well, sorry, Ksyukh. That's how it turned out. Who licked you?"
"Slavik from the third entrance came over. His wife, as usual, kicked him out of the house drunk. The mortgage is on her, so she has the right. So he wandered over to sleep at my place. He spent about an hour doing tongue pirouettes under the blanket for me, then fell asleep between my thighs. Snored into my pussy all night, didn't let me sleep."
"Why didn't you redirect him to me? You know my pussy hasn't been licked in a long time?"
"He's a bit scared of you, Karina. Afraid you'll smother him one day. They get timid after 30. When they're young, they dive into pilot's caps without a second thought. With experience comes understanding. So you need to be gentler with lickers. Spread your thighs wider and let them work as they can."
"You've become boring, Ksyusha. You used to be more fun. Now all you can do is have these tedious conversations."
"Yarik complained about you too. Says his neck hurts after your hugs. So he won't lick you anymore. We're not getting any younger, and we have to exist in competitive conditions. Whose pilot's cap do you think a licker will dive into: the one that will definitely smother him, or the one that provides space for the creative process?"
"God, it's so good that this is my entrance. Finally, I don't have to listen to all your tediousness. Okay, bye for now."
Karinka went home. I also trudged off to sleep, it was already late.
***
A few days passed, and every morning, leaving the house, I started noticing that this damn Land Cruiser was constantly stalking me. Both before and after work, it circles near the entrance. I gathered my courage and approached it myself.
"Mister, could you please move your Land Cruiser further away, otherwise I'll be forced to call my friend Valera for help. Although, what am I saying? Here he is, our Valera the pussy-licker! Why are you stalking me? Karina used your mouth, go and service her. Maybe she'll sit on your face one more time."
Valera sits silently and doesn't say anything at all.
"Why are you silent, you woodpecker?"
And then suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I notice someone is in the back seat. As it turned out, it was his wife.
"Ksenia, could you please sit down. We need to talk."
"I don't get into cars with strange men and women."
"Then just listen. Valera wants to lick your pussy sometimes, but in my presence. So he's under my supervision and under your pussy."
"Funny. And what, Valera, can't you lick your wife?"
"I don't come from cunnilingus. So it would be better if you specifically orgasm into his mouth."
"And what about Karina? Didn't you like her?"
"Your friend Karina almost smothered him during the act. Valera is scared. He hopes you'll be lenient and use his mouth and face as a sex toy, not as a thigh exercise machine."
I opened the door and sat in the back seat.
"And will you lick yourself?"
"No, I'm not into that..."
"You'll have to. It's been a while since I smeared such good makeup all over a pussy."