Candy, circus, love, and a hurricane.
The circus. The glitter of lights. The beautiful costumes of the performers. Often stupid, but fiery humor from the clowns. Amazing tricks by prestidigitators. And where do those bastards get those handkerchiefs from? And the pigeons and rabbits, from a hat that seemed empty? Jugglers with rings, balls, or even lit torches. Hey, what if they don't catch one? Not everyone wants to get hit on the head with such a fire-breathing object! Acrobats. Twirling and spinning so much it takes your breath away! I wonder what it would be like with some acrobat girl. She probably knows such positions? The Kama Sutra in the morning — takes a rest! And on the peach branches — in an instant, all the leaves will wither!
So what was I talking about? Well, I don't like the circus, that's all! And I don't like the theater either! And I very rarely go to the movies. And I don't have a TV. But I have a computer! But I have the internet!
But in those distant years, all these delights of civilization didn't exist...
But I had a girlfriend. In whom I was head over heels in love. She liked the circus. A circus, a big top circus, came to our town. They were assembling something in the city center, and then they stretched out a tarpaulin. Well, yes! They made a real dome.
Tickets, of course, were impossible to get. Back then, young people didn't sit at home playing Dota, Quake, or Need-for-Speed-whatever-they're-called-racing-games. That youth still had no idea about frictional impacts, the interaction of human organs, from German pornography. Although they probably knew everything! And I clearly lacked that knowledge and had too little practical experience... And to expand my knowledge and gain some experience, I first had to engage in the prelude — invite Irochka to the circus. Well, yes, that was her name — Irochka. And don't you dare tease me! I remember exactly — her name was Irochka. Whether there will be an interlude and an end, finally — time will tell.
I repeat — there were no tickets — there were no tickets, period! And how to get them, I couldn't figure out. The story is being written quickly, but time didn't fly so fast back then...
In the evening, mom comes in and announces from the doorway: "They gave me tickets to the circus at work. To the big top circus."
— Two. Take your sister and go with her.
— Actually, I wanted to go with my girlfriend, — I said, making a displeased face.
— I don't want to go to the circus, — my sister suddenly started whining. It seemed a tantrum was brewing.
— Just don't cry! If you don't want to, don't go! — mom handed the tickets to me, — And you, Yura, are an egoist!
And I'm not an egoist at all. Maybe my sister takes after me? And she doesn't like the circus either. Taking my little sister by the hand, I led her to the store and bought various chocolate candies, whichever she pointed her little finger at. Back then you could buy one of each.
Returning home, the first thing I did was make Irochka happy. I called on the phone:
— Irochka, I have a surprise for you! I have two tickets to the circus!
— Yurochka, you're such a great guy! You managed to get them after all! For what time?
After telling her the time and saying goodbye, I started preparing for the next day.
I prepared all evening, all night, and all morning. Well, at least at night I dreamed that I was preparing. Finally, the blessed hour arrived! In Valera's jeans, Kostya's shirt, and my own shoes, I headed for the date. It was a bright summer day.
On the way to the object of my passion, I bought a small bouquet of flowers and a couple of bags of candy. One contained Tuziki, and the other Barbariski. Irochka was incredibly happy to see the tickets. She put the bouquet in a vase, poured the candies into her purse.
— And why didn't you buy chocolate ones? You like chocolate ones, don't you?
— Why not — I bought them, but I had to reward my sister, because thanks to her, we can admire the magnificent viewing of circus spectacles! And besides, since my girlfriend doesn't like chocolate, it's neither gentlemanly nor chivalrous to consume this product in the presence of the lady of my heart!
— Chatterbox! Let's go already!
Inside the circus, it was somewhat gloomy. No colorful balloons, no posters with naked beauties urging you to drink Coca-Cola to avoid cavities and dandruff. There was absolutely no advertising for tampons, and I won't even mention Spermamint chewing gum! In general, the absence of such necessary advertising for very needed, useful, and important things evoked a nostalgic sadness for the future.
What, it couldn't evoke that? It evoked it in me! Even back then I possessed the gift of foresight and was tremblingly awaiting the arrival of the "next" era and guessed that someday, Arnie would say his famous, catchphrase: "I'll be back!"
Clowns — just clowns. Yes, and in life, there are a ton of them, and there are enough even now.
Maybe there were horses running in a circle? Big deal! They sometimes rode around the city back then too. There wasn't enough transport, and not often, but you had to see horses harnessed to a cart with boxes of "Zhiguli" beer. And what was "Zhiguli" beer like back then?! Yeah, no better than the current one! And in places, diluted one to one — even worse.
In short, what was happening in the arena didn't bother me much. I was bothered by my girl's knees, slightly peeking out from under her dress, and I stared at them much more than at the shiny beauties jumping and twirling hoops in the arena. Asking for another "Tuzik," I sort of accidentally placed my palm on Irochka's knee, slightly moving the dress in the process. Tearing herself away from the binoculars for a second, the mischievous girl looked at me with a meaningless glance, and again pressed her eyes to the eyepieces. Assuming she wasn't angry, and maybe even liked it, I continued the game. And now, the second knee was covered by my palm, and gentle stroking of it awakened my nature.
The mountain rose above the valley and rested against the sky, causing me some discomfort. The coveted hills were still so far away that they were barely discernible beyond the horizon of desires. It was still too early for me to dream about the castle of pleasures. And suddenly everything crumbled like a house of cards. It occurred to me that Irochka was allowing me to do this as a sign of gratitude for the ticket to the circus. Especially since I didn't get the tickets, they just floated into my hands.
— Yura, why did you take your hand away? — the minx whispered, again tearing herself away from the eyepieces, — your hand is so warm, and my knees are freezing. And I like it too.
The game continued! Looking around, is anyone watching? I bent down and covered my beloved's legs with tender kisses. For which I received a favor from my beloved, expressed by stroking my hair. That's when I realized that the coveted hills were not at all beyond the horizon of my dreams, but incredibly close. Carefully slipping my hand under the girl's raised elbow, I gently touched the coveted hill. The ice cracked and, heaving upward, almost broke through the sky. Fiery sparks, in a whirlwind of a wild dance, danced before my eyes. I didn't see or hear anything... I felt... I felt the soft carpet of wildflowers hiding the beauty of the hill. And beneath it, a breathing volcano of a beating heart. SHE WASN'T WEARING A BRA!!! I covered the dome with my hand — the dome of the entire big top circus. Inside which beat a flame, pain, admiration, joy, softness, and the roundness of a girl's breast.
Suddenly Irochka pressed my hand with her elbow, and at the same time a loud clap sounded above, a square formed in the tarpaulin... A square of black-and-blue sky. I was thrown to the ground from the unattainable heights of bliss... The elderly performers in the arena stopped their act and looked up at this square. Everyone who was in the circus looked at this square. Deathly silence... The orchestra fell silent...
Death was peeking through this peephole and predatorily bared its eyeless smile (Well, I'm getting carried away! How could it peek without eyes?!) It decided to show us its circus! And gave the big top a gentle push. Three
ropes holding the structure instantly snapped. The dome began to lose its shape. The square also began to lose its shape and, expanding in different directions, showed all of us a leaden-bluish, in places black sky...
Irochka let go of my hand. Hugging her tightly and whispering to her that nothing terrible would happen to us. After all, I hadn't yet seen Bruce Lee in his magnificent action movies. I hadn't yet been given the chance to watch "The Greek Fig Tree" 5 times in one sitting. And Emmanuelle Arsan didn't yet bear her name...
In short, I calmed her down as best I could, didn't let her panic. And Panic? Panic began! Oh! And what panic! If you've watched Titanic-like movies, you should understand what kind of panic THAT was! Screams and shrieks echoed through the quickly dying dome. The ushers trying to hold the ropes and the performers were blown off the arena in an instant. The rows of seats quickly emptied. We were sitting in the middle...
Within a few seconds, our row was completely empty. To this day I can't understand how we weren't hit? Did they jump over us or something? A crush formed below. I'm sure many were injured, getting minor bruises and scratches. I held onto the girl. I won't hide it, it was difficult for me. Where did so much strength come from in this body weighing just over 45 kilos? I knew. It was panic and fear...
— Don't squirm! — I shouted at her somewhat roughly, — and a little softer, — I'm with you! And that means nothing will happen!
I was so sure of my rightness that when the dome began to collapse in our direction, I wasn't scared at all. I was still very young and arrogant enough to think that some devil-knows-where-it-came-from hurricane couldn't harm me. And especially my girl. Still, I carefully covered her with my body. Just in case. After all, I already knew that Hennessy cognac was complete crap, and "Wine old whiskey" would taste like moonshine distilled the day before yesterday by Uncle Vasya, who didn't even suspect that his divine drink was many times more pleasant to drink and you wouldn't have a headache from it in the morning...
In short, I WAS SURE!
— Yur, what's going on out there? — my beauty asked, burying her nose in the shirt from Georgiy (or Viktor?) What difference does it make! She was in my arms! That means life was worth it, and stood...
We began to descend towards the exit. The dome didn't exist. The dome didn't exist! Could shreds and tatters of tarpaulin be called a dome? Various items lay on the seats, abandoned in panic by the fleeing spectators. Umbrellas and raincoats, bags and ladies' scarves. Near a crutch leaning forlornly against a seat stood a lady's shoe of a delicate turquoise color.
I imagined the unfortunate disabled person, zealously running away, from what and whom? Or maybe he just limped and therefore needed a crutch? Although unlikely — lame people walk with canes. I also imagined a lady who lost her shoe in a hurry. She probably threw away the second one.
At the exit, people in white coats approached us several times and asked if we needed medical assistance. It seems there were two or three injured with fractures. I don't remember. Youth is still more selfish. And until I had been married and hadn't fathered a bunch of... Okay, I won't burden you with unnecessary philosophy of life.
In short, I was satisfied. And maybe even a little happy, because the central pole landed about twenty meters from me, Well maybe thirty... Finally, we went outside. A crowd of people swarmed near the ticket booths. Someone in a loud voice demanded a refund. From different places, cries were heard from those who had lost friends and relatives in the commotion
We walked, holding hands, looking in amazement at the streets after the Armageddon that had passed here. A sudden thought visited my young head: "Could this be the end of the world?" but it didn't get to stay long! Memories that I hadn't yet heard Alla Borisovna's voice and wasn't aware of what apples do in the snow, drove it out.
The scene was very unseemly, Here and there lay uprooted trees. Stalls near the stores lay neatly in rows. In one of the empty, standing buses, a tree stuck out, thrust into the windshield by the giant — the hurricane. It was as if in a rage it had thrown its arrow of death.
Yes! It was a hurricane of unprecedented strength. A tornado, sucking up and lifting various objects high, and then throwing them to the ground, everything that came under its hand...
— My God! What about the driver? — Irochka asked and pressed herself against me.
— Most likely, he got off with a light fright. The tree didn't hit from his side.
Suddenly, my lovely one, when the conversation turned to the circus, declared:
— We were there...
Questions poured in from all sides like hail, and Irochka began answering them in a rush. According to her, we weren't in the big top, but on the notorious Titanic...
Masts were cracking, ropes whistled all around, cutting the inattentive to pieces. The whirlwind tore the sails, and waves one after another flooded the deck, carrying their victims into the abyss. She described it very colorfully.
— ... and then that central mast broke and started falling on us. Yurochka heroically covered me with his body! But we were lucky, the mast fell just an inch from my Yurochka!
Hearing the word: "inch," I opened my mouth to explain some incompetence of my girlfriend in measuring distances. But the word: "my," made it snap shut immediately. Everyone warmly expressed their admiration and gratitude to me for not losing my head at the critical moment and carrying my beloved out of the blazing circus in my arms.
Irochka tried to explain that nothing seemed to be burning there. But no way. They KNEW EXACTLY HOW everything HAPPENED for real.
One lady missed her stop, explaining to Irochka that she should, without leaving this spot, drag me to the REGISTRY OFFICE.
I sincerely felt sorry for them. Well, what kind of hero am I, damn it?
Simply, I knew for a fact that I still had to fall into the clawed paws of the Internet and, there would be no possibility of escaping from the clutches of this terrible beast...