Long-awaited day off
The long-awaited day off!
Wanted to relax with my wife.
But then my mother-in-law shows up at the door —
— Hello, dear son-in-law!
— Damn you, for fuck's sake!
How annoying can you be!
She got the urge to dig up potatoes
At the dacha in the morning…
As soon as I heard that —
I jumped straight to the wardrobe!
Wanted to hide quickly,
But there's a guy standing in the closet…
My wife rushed into the room
— Where are you, darling? — she shouts.
— You promised to help mom!
I stay silent, the guy stays silent…
Mother-in-law with a stern remark:
— Where's your lame goat?
My neighbor giggled.
I gave him a fist in response.
My wife heard the laughter,
Ran straight to the wardrobe.
She yanks the wardrobe open —
There are two guys side by side…
Only I'm standing there dressed,
And the guy is in great hope
That he'll stay alive
And maybe go home…
— What's this hide-and-seek all of a sudden?
Explain it to me, my husband!
— Hiding from your mother
And from that fucking dacha!
Answer me, truthfully —
What the hell is this guy doing in the wardrobe?!
My wife scratched her bun,
Thought about it and told me:
— I didn't see you, get it?
And you didn't see him — there!
I looked at the guy —
At the young asshole,
And I felt so sorry for us both!
Everything in this life is so fucking annoying!!!
So I agreed with my wife:
I don't see anyone — I'm blind!
— I couldn't find him, mom!
My blockhead slipped away somewhere. —
That's what my daughter shouted to her mom
And took off together with my mother-in-law…
I sighed with relief
And extended my hand to the guy:
— Do you drink vodka?
— Yeah, sometimes!
— Wanna go have a drink?
— I don't drink in the morning!
— Since you're fucking my wife,
You'll drink vodka with me!
Then you'll tidy up the apartment,
Wash the dishes, wipe the floors!
Man, you're a dumbass, damn it!
Learn how to relax properly!