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Now, I would jerk off every evening imagining myself going down on the "Three Ls" for bottle caps. I justified it to myself and convinced myself it was normal, the main thing was to keep it a secret, because girls should be grateful for such an unprecedented gift as a kiss on the pussy.
My dick now, before the daily jerk-off session, would flat-out refuse to get hard at the thought of fucking a girl or giving her head; now it only reacted to kissing pussy and light dominance in the form of persuasion, and then blackmail, that if I refused to lick, everyone would find out what a pussy-licker I was.
The "Three Ls" also used to come over to my older brother Edik, who was, by the way,
like them, three years older than me, and they'd listen to their metal music. After that incident, I was too embarrassed to go into their room and would constantly go outside, where I'd play with my favorite bottle caps, remembering Lyuda's bottle caps.The "Three Ls" now sort of ignored me everywhere, only nodding a greeting to each other from afar, and that was it. However, I now secretly watched them walk away, imagining how I would lick their pussies for bottle caps and how I would lick, apologizing to my Aphrodite, Lida.
And then, about a month later, I saw my same-age friend from the courtyard, Vova, with a beautiful bottle cap, similar to one of those I had seen on Lyuda, and of course, I immediately put two and two together in my own way.
"Where did you get a bottle cap like that?" I asked him, knowing exactly where he got it from.
I immediately felt disgusted by my now former friend Vova. He was now, to me, a pussy-licker who had gone down on Lyuda for that bottle cap, and being friends with him now was shameful and even dangerous. I was sure I was right, because Vova lived in the same entrance as Lyuda and they definitely knew each other.
"I won't tell," said the boasting Vova. "Where I got it, there aren't any more."
"Yeah, you—" I suddenly wanted to accuse him of being a pussy-licker, but I immediately stopped myself, feeling sorry for him, because I was essentially the same and wouldn't want to be exposed like that if something happened.
"What?" Vova asked me.
"Nothing," I said. "Want to trade for plain ones?"
"No," he said. "I have plenty of bottle caps to trade this one."
"Well, how many would you trade it for anyway?" I asked Vova, really wanting such a bottle cap, thinking that he could just go get himself another one by licking for it.
"Well, for example, maybe think about thirty for it," Vova pondered.
"Wow," I smiled, mentally regretting that I simply didn't have that many bottle caps.
All the guys who were playing at that moment surrounded Vova, examining such an amazing bottle cap, genuinely envying him. Now he became the star and the enviable friend of everyone in the courtyard.
"Ugh," I thought, "if only you knew how he earned that bottle cap."
It became very unpleasant for me to be near Vova the pussy-licker, or maybe I was just jealous that he had such a beautiful bottle cap, or maybe just jealous that Lyuda didn't try to get me but traded for this nasty Vova instead. I went home, where metal music was playing in the room.
Since I was always allowed in my brother's room, I entered without permission, where, as expected, the "Three Ls" were also there, and sat in the only free spot, which, by coincidence, was right next to Lyuda. She hugged me in a friendly way, throwing her arm over my shoulder, as if nothing had happened and we hadn't had such a long break in communication.
Of course, on another occasion, I would have sat at the feet of my former Aphrodite Lida, who was sitting in the armchair, but she was probably, as I thought, offended by me. Everyone sat listening to music, discussing the choruses and something else about the music, sometimes nodding their heads to the beat, especially the girls looked beautiful doing it when their hair flew from side to side.
My thigh was pressed against Lyuda's thigh, and I imagined what had already become so familiar and exciting to me, which of course made my dick hard, and I, fidgeting in place, discreetly adjusted it. Sometimes I caught a displeased look from Lida, and Lyuba paid no attention to me at all.
"I know you gave Vovka a bottle cap?" I finally couldn't resist and whispered in Lyuda's ear during the loud music.
She, without answering anything, continued shaking her head to the music, digesting the information she received from me, and I looked at her and waited for an answer.
Finally, she turned to me and, either nodding or jerking her head to the music in an unclear way, broke into a deep, ear-to-ear smile, and then winked at me as a friend, leaving this intrigue unclear to me.
"Let's go out," Lyuda said to me about ten minutes later.
The two of us left the room and went to my room. She sat on my bed, and I sat on my chair by the desk. She silently stared at me, as if she wanted to read something in my head, and I, unable to withstand her gaze and expecting a very interesting answer, blushed and for some reason guiltily lowered my eyes.
"Want a bottle cap?" she asked me with a smirk in her voice.
What that meant, I of course understood, but with a hard-on in my pants, I just silently nodded to her, not looking her in the eyes, still not getting an answer from her about my question of where Vovka got the bottle cap. And only later did it dawn on me what my nod meant.
"Come to my place tomorrow at 2 PM," said Lyuda, and without waiting for an answer from me, she stood up and, leaning towards my ear, added, "I'll be alone waiting for you, don't chicken out, this will be our secret."
She left my room, leaving me alone with the terrible thoughts that I had asked to become her pussy-licker myself. A real revolution was happening in my head then, sometimes those who said it was unacceptable won, sometimes those who said it was normal for adults and that it would only be once and in secret, because she would be alone and no one would find out about it.
At the same time, I calmed and persuaded myself, thinking that I would have that very bottle cap, which I certainly wouldn't show to anyone, because Vovka, for example, would immediately understand what I got it for. And how many more Vovkas are there anyway?
It was shameful and very shameful, but my stomach was churning with excitement and I didn't know how to make it to the evening jerk-off session. I didn't go into the room that day anymore, but just stupidly opened a textbook, sat in my room, and thought, imagining how it would happen tomorrow. Hoping she wouldn't tell her inseparable girlfriends that I agreed or even, it turns out, asked to lick her pussy for a bottle cap myself.
The whole evening, night, and the next day dragged on unbearably long and hard. Thoughts about whether to go to Lyuda or not simply exhausted and weakened me. When the time came, my legs turned to jelly, and I couldn't bring myself to stand up and leave the room, let alone go to Lyuda; I simply didn't have the courage, and I just stupidly watched as the clock hands first showed 2 PM, then 3 PM, and then I realized I had done the right thing! I acted like a real man, not some pussy-licker, and whatever Lyuda had imagined was her problem and her sick imagination, and I had only asked if she gave Vovka a bottle cap, knowing she had one like that and knowing what she could have given it to him for.
In the evening, as if nothing had happened, I went into my brother's room and saw that none of the "Three Ls" were there; I was of course upset, but glad that I didn't have to hide my eyes from Lyuda's silent questions.
"Why didn't you come?" Lyuda stopped me the next day in my entrance when I was going home.
"What for?" I pulled my hand out of her grip.
"For the bottle cap," Lyuda smiled at me. "You wanted it yourself!"
"I only wanted to know what you gave Vovka the bottle cap for," I answered her a bit aggressively. "Is he a pussy-licker now?"
"I didn't give anything to any Vovka," the metalhead Lyuda shook me. "I'm saving it for you, Lyonya."
She looked at me from slightly above, as she was taller. Her smiling eyes looked into mine and tried to read something there again. Her persistent gaze and probably my sick imagination that she was brazenly coming onto me and wanted a female blowjob from me—that's what we used to call it back then, and no one knew the word cunnilingus at all—aroused me and awakened in me again an unbearable desire to go down on her.
"Will this definitely stay between us?" I asked, as if driving a nail into my own coffin lid.
"Well, of course, silly," she smiled at me, having gotten the consent she was after, hugged me by the shoulders, and moved with me towards the exit from the entrance.
"Where are we going?" I asked her guiltily and dejectedly.
"To my place, Lyonya," she smiled, quickening her step, as if afraid I would change my mind.
My legs carried me along with her on their own, and I was still trying to get her assurance that she wouldn't tell anyone about me. She, already not even looking at me and sighing as if I were such a bore, answered that it would be our secret and no one would find out, and also said that I could choose one myself, the bottle cap I liked the most.
Then, frantically and noticeably nervous, she opened the front door, then closed it, and right there on the threshold in the hallway, she pulled me down by the shoulders, urging me to kneel before her right there.
"Lyud," I asked her, as if before death itself, "are you sure?"
"Well, of course, sure, Lyonya," she pressed me down, already closing her eyes in anticipation of the secret union, what we used to call a female blowjob back then.
She was clearly aroused, just like me. I first squatted down, but it was uncomfortable, and I got on my knees, completely forgetting to agree with her on how long I was supposed to lick her for.
Lyuda, unbuttoning her leather skirt, hurriedly took it off, dancing with her hips, and then our eyes met. She looked at me from above, and I at her from below; an awkward pause appeared. Who was supposed to take off her panties?
I was very embarrassed to touch her panties and pull them down, and she was also noticeably embarrassed.
"Let's go to the bathroom, Lyonya, in the dark," she said, breaking our stupid silence. "I can't do it in the light."